Our intelligence triumphs when we bring into focus the self-harming dynamics going on in our psyche. These conflicting dynamics are very much indifferent to our wellbeing. When they remain hidden from us, we may have only a hit-or-miss capacity for healthy self-regulation. (An … [Read more...] about Are You Addicted to Self-Punishment?
inner critic
The Key to Emotional Self-Regulation
How much choice do we have at any given moment to feel good or okay instead of miserable? Quite a lot, it turns out, when we understand the nature of inner conflict. Most of us believe we’re basically good and decent. Yet often we can’t feel such attributes as a reassuring … [Read more...] about The Key to Emotional Self-Regulation
The Blindness of the Species
The surging mental-health distress among children and adults attests to the urgency of demystifying the human psyche. We blind ourselves—through a false self, naïve ego-ideal, and vainglorious self-image—to the inner dynamics in our psyche. We are not recognizing how we become … [Read more...] about The Blindness of the Species
Don’t Be Duped by Your Defenses
If there’s one subject that ought to be required in the classroom, it’s the study of how we deceive ourselves. Self-deception occurs largely through unconscious mental activities that are associated with inner conflict. It’s as if mischievous imps are cavorting inside us, … [Read more...] about Don’t Be Duped by Your Defenses
Our Compulsion to Self-Punish
For many of us, a steady stream of emotional self-punishment can feel as natural as breathing. The process of punishing oneself can operate so subtly that people don’t detect its pernicious nature. This is not a discussion of physical self-injury or self-harm such as skin … [Read more...] about Our Compulsion to Self-Punish